Saturday, August 16, 2008

"LET DREAMS BE DREAMS"



In another race to find answers to questions that have been pestering my brain since the last few blog posts..Here is another answer I got..These last few months I have had the most unanswerable questions popping up in my mind...rushing me inside-out...leaving me sad...unhappy with myself..Disgusted and wasted... (As usual)...
And then one night...when I was trying to sleep on my wet bed... (Wet with tearz... [: P]...!!)...just like many other nights...I was feeling lost...unwanted... (As usual)...2:00 A.M. …a scream...I sat up...it was all hush outside...and very-very noisy inside...a shuddery lull…I went out..Nothing...the squall...I realized...was from within...my conscience...was screaming to be heard...and I tried remembering...the last time I talked to myself...it was a long…long time…since I averted doing that..And now I couldn’t do it anymore...and so I surrendered and took heed of it..Curled up in my balcony...no stars, no street lights...the only thing I could hear was the rain drops meeting the ground...and forming ripples..I wondered how something so small...could create half-a-hundred ripples...flowing out from a point...circling on and on and on…
This is the way things are happening in my life...maybe something as small as a droplet...since neglected...has caused the ripples of unhappiness..But what is that little thing? Why can’t I undo it??..How much I wish the ‘backspace’ on my keyboard...worked in my life...i wish...i wish...I wish..!!..(Ok...let’s not talk of the things tat can’t happen)...so I sat pondering over the questions my conscience was putting up on me...
It asked me...the reason of being unhappy...when all that is happening in my life is only because of the decisions I MADE...why am I blaming the life to be unkind to me...when all the things I got are the ones I CHOSE..??And why am I sad when I had promised it... (Read conscience)...to be happy in wateva I get...thankful wen I get gud...and managing to pull myself off when bad comes in my way..!!Why am I complicating things now...when I loved simple..!!..And why am I losing strength when I knew since the beginning that the ways I chose...are not bcuz they are easygoing..(Actually they were never meant to be easygoing)..But because I feel-like passing them...awww!! I so miss the gurl inside me who wanted to live life in ‘slow-motion’...who wanted seconds to pass like hrz...just so that she can enjoy every moment..!!..And why now do I want to fast-forward my life?? (Silly!!)
The answer I managed out to all this was EXPECTATIONS...ones that I have from me...and those that my frnz...my family...and the world has...and just in the rush to finish all what they want from me...I’ve been heading for the hills since long now…I’m tired..Exhausted...and maybe I’ve missed myself somewhere in the hie...its just when dreams turn into expectations...that all gets bungled..!!When I was in grade 6...i dreamt of being a doctor...and now this is wat I expect from myself...wat my family expects of me. And all the running I’m doing is just to stand one-piece and victorious on their expectations..It is no longer a dream anymore...it’s a duty..!!..
Now what happens when dreams don’t come true??Do we cry over it..??No...We sleep again...have a new dream that night or maybe the same one...but what if expectations aren’t finished??...we feel busted...and wasted...
So what I can now conclude from all the thinking that night...I scribble it into a little not-a-poem…


“Let dreams be dreams,
Have a B-E-A-utiful dream each night...
And if the dream doesn’t come true, don’t worry,
Have a new dream tonight...

But in all this rush...and pace of life,
Don’t let your dreamz and expectations coincide...
Cuz then is when the going gets tough…
And that is when it HURTS INSIDE..!!..”

46 comments:

Rajesh said...

Superb...I would say this's your best till date...you're improving with every post and this's no different...wonderful...I've no words to describe...your thought process s good and penning down the same needs spl skills and u seem to b a master at that...great job...keep it up..

~~~SWEET DREAMS~~~

nikkita said...

@rajesh
thank you so very much..i hope i keep up this work..

Dheeraj Ramchandani said...

hmmm...u want a cmment...here it goes...

very nice post...gud thghts...u forc me 2 thnk over ur thghts..(u knw it already)!!!...well...i'd like to admit that ur thghts cnfused me too..though i was trying to cheer u...

newyz..as i hv alwayz said ur posts r awesome...wrth reading...reflects ur maturity...kuch naya seekhne ko milta hai..a way of thnkng...

ok..bahut hua..keep it up..cntinue ur writing...n dnt wrry...evthng vl get alryt..hv faith in god

Sakshi said...

The way i see it..(and i hope it makes you feel better)

The best situation in life is when the lines dividing your dreams and the expectations from you blur into nothingness. You work for one goal..while you slog to meet the expectations you are on your way of realizing your dream.
When you fulfill the expectations you start living your dream!

What more can you want from life...at least, unlike poor poor me, you didn't have to choose between your dream and your so-called duty(call it your parents' dream for you)!

Whatsay?

nikkita said...

@sakshi
thnx...but beep taz wat i was trying to say...i dont dream of it anymore...im running for it just bcuz that is wat is expctd of me..

nikkita said...

@dheeraj..
chalo finally...i did force u to think over my thoughts..
and thanx for tryin to ceer me up!!
and wat are u confused for??

C R D said...

How much I wish the ‘backspace’ on my keyboard...worked in my life...i wish...i wish...I wish..!!.

i loved this line

well yea..unfulfilled drreams upset us..but i guess our life wudnt have meaning without dreams...if all dreams got fulfilled , what wud we live for??

cheers
Chris

btw updated ma blog too :)

nikkita said...

@crd
thnx for the comment..
i loved that line too..and i totally agree..tat our life doesnt hav any meaning without dreams..
will check ur blog soon..

cheerz!!
luv:nickku

Matangi Mawley said...

my-my! u sure have a gr8 blog here.. n u write beautifully.. m blogrollin u too..

nikkita said...

@mm..
thanku so much ...um a lil kid...jus started blogging..
thnx..newayz..

siddhu said...

hey gr8 blog yaar..i jus loved that poem..well...u may not call it a poem..the first four lines were simply superb!!!!!!

Tanmay Khandelwal said...

hey dear....
hmmm.....wat 2 say yaar.....really amazing...n i saw ur sad face again.....(i dun knoe wen was d first)...sometimes we just become a completely another person...completely different one......

hey..u realised d expectation thing come everywhere...y do we haev expectations and y we become sad wen they didnt get fulfilled......y...y...y..?????

okay..leave that.....
keep smiling dear....take care a lott.......
luv : tanu(JANN)

Rakesh said...

hey cool blog ya

nikkita said...

@sidddhu
welcum to my blog..and thanx for the comment..

nikkita said...

@tanu
oye!! thnx yaar..han kabi kabi kuch ho sa jata hai...

nikkita said...

@rakesh
welcum to my blog keep visiting...

Jyothikarthik said...

Really a great post
Enjoyed each and every word coz, ive bin through the same things too....
And the last poem, esply the line wer "Don’t let your dreamz and expectations coincide..."
meant a lot...
Kudos!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fantastic blog

Jk!

Jyothikarthik said...

Do visit my blog, I'd be happy :)

nikkita said...

@JK
welcum to my blog..i think each one of us goes through this phase atleast once in their lives..thnx 4 the comment
keep cumin..

The Dreamy Princess said...

woah...good blog...
i liked the thoughts and the way you related it with the water droplets n all that...cool!!!
do visit my blog too..
:-D

gunj said...

babes u shud stop analysing life so much! just live it :)
it all works out fo d best in d end:)

Rakesh said...

hey will surely keep visiting now that i have blog rolled you will keeping looking for new posts

Prashant Sree said...

Hi Nikku,

Very impressive article. You have summarized the one of the essence of our life.,. Many of us like to rush past our present moments and then wonder how time passed by so soon. The thoughts you had meditated upon are very true in every way. Yes, Expectations builds up tremendous pressure and it is a litmus test of a person's character, how well he is to take on challenges. I loved this line:

“Let dreams be dreams,
Have a B-E-A-utiful dream each night...
And if the dream doesn’t come true, don’t worry,
Have a new dream tonight..."

A new dream everyday... Simply Superb.

The last 2 lines

"Cuz then is when the going gets tough…
And that is when it HURTS INSIDE..!!..”

Over a period of time when you start realizing and learn to cope up with your dreams and thoughts, the last line would get modified as :

"Cuz then is when the going gets tough…
That is when the tough gets going..."

I dont mean this only for rhetoric sake.,. It is the truth.

Drop in by my blog too. Would appreciate that. :)

Happy Writing !!

Cheers !!

RiverSoul said...

Wonderful blog.
Your template is pleasing to look at too.
Compliments ur blog well.

And you have the rare ability,
Of being able to transfer your emotions, exactly, into wonderfull words.

And you're no amateur.
:)
I'm blogrolling ya.

Hope you visit my blog again sometime.
:)

nikkita said...

@ dreamy princess
hey welcum to my blog..um happy u liked it...keep visiting

nikkita said...

@gunj..
hmm..i agree..its better to jus live life..but sometimes..u do need to analyse a lil..keep cumin to my blog..

nikkita said...

@rakesh..
:)
thanks for blogrollin..keep cumin

nikkita said...

@prasant sree
wow thanks for the comment..its lovely...n i wud luk frwd to the day wen sumthin like u mentioned happens..
keep visitng

nikkita said...

@river soul...

wow thanx for the comment
and thanku so much for this "And you have the rare ability,
Of being able to transfer your emotions, exactly, into wonderfull words."

*happy*
keep cumin...
:)

Tiger said...

excellent analysis.. but some where we miss the line

nikkita said...

@hey tiger
welcum to my blog..
tazz what we always miss the line
thanx for the comment..keep visiting...

Tara said...

Hey really good work Niccku! Bolna padega ladki toh bahut accha likhti hai! Keep up the good work girl! Now your blog won't miss me any longer, main toh yahin hoon! BTW, loved the little not-a-poem, it conveyed the entire illusions and troubles of life in such a simple and sweet manner!!! Chalo, Rock On Girl!

nikkita said...

wo...tara is bak tara is bak...wid her shweet shweet comments...thanks for this one....
love u!!

nikkita said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
gaurangi said...

hey we have to face this thing sm day or the other...
Same at my side, once I dreamt of being an IITian, it seems a bigger dream now, so finally i settled on wd ma parents' xpectations...bt ya Im happy now...
Wishing d same happiness 4 u

nikkita said...

@gaurangi..
hey frn...thanku so much...
wishing u all the luck too...
thanx..keep visiting...

DarkLord said...

U really have this art of writing..... do try out my blog nd plz leave ur views

nikkita said...

@dark lord..
thanx for droppiing by..
thanx for commenting...
and art of writin..meeh!!
yeah..i try my best..
off to ur blog..
keep coming..
cheerz!1

Dani said...

Good post.

nikkita said...

@dani hey..welcome to my blog..
thanx..keep visiting..

nikkita said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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